Thursday, August 04, 2011

What I Learned From the Pod People

With all the great, and not so great, alien invasion stories out there these days I thought now would be a good time to look at that particular sub group of sneaky aliens who do more than just send an armada to conquer our planet, but the ones who actually impersonate humans. It seems like everytime an alien is impersonating a human it spells big trouble. They're always up to some nefarious plot, and I can only be thankful that we've got an abundance of plucky young scientists, journalists, or blue collar police officers constantly on the lookout for the vile tricksters. With that in mind, here are a few thoughts from a plucky young blogger (that's me!) on what to be on the lookout for when dealing with the pod people.

  • Show me some more of this Earth thing called kissing...

Aliens are horny. Seriously; just think about it. Aliens must either have totally different concepts of sex, or just never experienced the wonders of a romp in the hay because they seem to always want to get it on with humans. Does it make sense? No, of course not. Would you want to screw the first Grey you met? My guess is not. But everything from Earth Girls are Easy to My Stepmother is an Alien has told us that all ET really wants is to get busy with a human. The tricky thing though is that most of the time its more like Splice, or even worse Species... Sure it may be the best sex ever, but aliens obviously like it rough in the sack and are usually just as willing to kill a human as screw them.

  • They may look good, but whats with the voice?

How come an advanced alien culture can create perfect doppelganger bodies of humans, imitate us in every way and blend into our society secretly but just can't get that voice right? From The classic The Invasion of the Body Snatchers to The Thing, more recently The Invasion aliens seem to have a weird thing about screaming in a decidedly un-human way. Just check this out.

  • Those Tricky Human Emotions

Of course the biggest tell for an alien among us is their utter lack of understanding of those pesky human emotions. Yes its a proven fact, aliens do not know the meaning of the word love. That is of course until they meet that one special human who can show them the depth of emotion. Even still this is the toughest thing aliens will ever have to learn about humans, our emotions are just too complex for them to easily grasp, despite their incredibly advanced technology. And that's why we will always prevail. Again, The Invasion of the Body Snatchers comes to mind here, as does The Arrival, and of course, if you want to talk about our unique and special emotional makeup you need look no further than the oh so disappointing ending to Contact.

Here's the take away from all this though, aliens are not all E.T and Alf. Aliens are tricky, and when they show up in their Edgar suit we should be careful. My advice: find the weakness and exploit it. Weather its a tasty rat that they can't help but gobble up, or a hot wire in a dish of blood, we need to step up our game and be on the lookout. In a best case scenario we'll at least have a fighting chance, like my hero Rowdy Roddy Piper in They Live. I definitely need some of those sunglasses for myself :)

In case you haven't seen it yet, below is the trailer for the newest version of The Thing, it comes out this October, and it looks awesome! Also if you're a fan of Carpenter's 1982 version of the film, you've really got to check out Escape Pod from a few weeks ago with a great story tied into that film called The Things, its really worth the listen.


1 comment:

cherrybombs said...

fantastic films!! viva la canada!