Tuesday, June 10, 2008

3 quick reviews

So while my wife has been traveling for work, I've been whiling my evenings away in front of the computer watching movies that I missed over the past few months. These aren't great movies by any means, but they are all films I've mentioned here at least once, and thought I'd share my thoughts on. Its a mediocre movie marathon!

10 000 BC

Ahh 10 000 BC. It seemed like a film that had so much to offer; a film with such promise. But then, it turned into a very average totally predictable mostly silly adventure film. The movie, which plays as a sort of Clan of the Cave Bear, stars a slew of young, pretty, and forgettable people dressed up as if they're supposed to be dirty and ugly. But since everyone has perfect shining teeth, dreadlocks that a quaffed just so, and toned tan bodies, I just couldn't buy it. Aside from the lack of realism on that front, the story itself goes from one ridiculous antic to another. The protagonist, is a mammoth hunter, who is destined to lead the serfs of Egypt in revolt against their (possibly Atlantean, possibly alien) overlords. And the film plays a little too campy for its own good. I know its supposed to be a fun, action movie, but it sure takes itself pretty seriously for what it is. When the sabertooth tiger decides not to eat the protagonist the second time because obviously he is the chosen one, I just lost all faith in anything decent really coming from the film. Its not a terrible movie, and I give the movie props for tackling a timeperiod that is largely ignored. But its not as good as it could be. And even with the over the top mammoth stampedes, this film is only really good for a rental. But just know what you're getting yourself into when you start.


This movie reminds me of a conglomeration of about 10 other movies, and essentially that's what it is. A lot of the Mad Max series, mixed with some Resident Evil, and elements of 28 Weeks Later, I Am Legend, C.H.U.D., The Warriors, and really any end of the world kind of film. Oh, but throw in some Transporter, and a large section of bad medieval stuff as well. Can't forget that stuff. The film is pretty much exactly as you'd expect, a total hodge podge cluster fuck. It is overly gory, has too many action scenes for its own good, and stinks of improbability. I honestly think as a film going culture we are past the point of believing that just because its the end of the world we all have to get mohawks and lip piercings. This is the kind of film a thirteen year boy old might really like, although it doesn't have enough nudity. But for the rest of us, this film is too much and too disjointed. Do not bother watching this film in any capacity.


I can see why this film seemed like a good idea, especially for star Hayden Christensen's career. He needs a hit to get hit career on track soon, or its just going to get tougher and tougher. This might've been that hit if not for a few unfortunate flaws. The thing to remember with Jumper, the redeeming factor that you have to keep reminding yourself about is that this film is obviously made for a young adult audience. Taken in that context I can understand why they made some of the choices they did. The film is really melodramatic, an acting style that seems a perfect fit for the brooding Christensen. It also plays into a very comic book kind of feel. While an honestly serious take on this material would've been interesting, this film is definitely not that. Serious is not something you can label this film with at any point. But the actors are mostly charismatic. Sam Jackson does a serviceable job as the baddie, and the varied locations of the film are honestly impressive (it was filmed in 14 different countries). Whether as Christensen has indicated he would like, it should really be made into a trilogy of films remains to be seen. But as long as you keep what this film is and isn't in mind when watching I think Jumper isn't nearly as terrible as it could've been.

Glowing reviews one and all; I know. More to come as it comes my friends. Until next time, later :)

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