Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Turning 30...

So I feel like I should spend some time reflecting here today. Today I'm 30. It seems like it should be a sort of milestone. I'm not totally sure it is, but it seems like the convention to accept it as one. Personally I've always preferred defining my life by actions and events, than arbitrary days; but since I'm here, and a little reflection is always a good thing I thought I'd share some revelations that I've had in these past 30 years on earth. I won't claim that this is any groundbreaking wisdom here, but its how I live my life, and that's worked out pretty well so far :)

I've had a lot of good times and a few bad ones over the past 30 years. I've definitely made my share of mistakes. But I really try to live without regrets. Sure I get bogged down by the past sometimes, and as you all know I enjoy my nostalgia, but I don't want to ever feel like I would've made different choices. I couldn't have, or I wouldn't be me now. I've definitely made mistakes, and will again I'm sure, but I know I'm a better smarter person for the life experiences that I've had. If I have one thing to share, totally honestly, its live without regret.

Do things. I know it sounds obvious, but actually doing things, anything really but hopefully something your passionate about, is basically the most rewarding experience you can have. Doing nothing, accomplishes nothing. The apathetic angst of my formidable teenage years is bullshit; and I think everyone knows it. Doing things, and caring about doing it matters. I have always felt better about myself when I'm engaged in something. This is probably also the biggest ongoing struggle for me as well. It's just sooo easy to sit back and chill, let life just sort of wash over you. Yes that's an experience as well, but why lie in the waves when you could be surfing? My goal for the next 30 years, is to do more things that I love, and let myself enjoy them. I don't know if I'll ever actually 'live up to my potential' but I'd be a fool if I didn't keep trying.

You know I'm a sometimes kind of overly-dramatic person, right? Well probably because of that, there have been a few times in my life, I can think of three, where either I thought I was going to die, or for some other reason I has a very brief amount of time to contemplate my life as a whole. In those times, those few seconds where I have been faced with analyzing the state of my life because I thought, if only for a few seconds, that this would be my end I've come to a few starting and very reassuring conclusions. I don't know if anyone else out there has experienced what I'm talking about, faced with the thought of immediate death, I have had moments of total lucidity. That totally cliched moment where my life has actually flashed in front of my eyes. Only for real. It's a pretty interesting experience, and if you've ever had it you have to just know, that if humans ever found a way to tap into that potential brainpower whenever we wanted, we could do anything.

And in those odd moments of lucidity, its always come down to two things. Well one feeling, one reaction, I've got a lot of love in my life, and I'm really thankful for that. I'm happy. Honestly happy, because I've been blessed with a lot of amazing people who care about me. And I enjoy life, I really do. Have you ever met those hippies who wander around and tell everyone they meet that they love them? Well, that's about it. I mean I get it. Life and everything in it is beautiful, and I love life. Even the bad parts are still a part of the whole, and that whole is the most amazing thing ever. ever. If there is one thing that makes me believe in God, this is it. Because to me God is that power of love. Just like Huey Lewis said it was...

I guess if I had a point to that thought, it would be that I'd advise you to try to recognize what's around you. Don't fill your life with hate, or fear, or regrets there's no point in holding onto that stuff. Try to embrace life. And appreciate all of the good things, and people around you.

Alright, this is a bit too serious now I suppose. I know its not typically what I talk about here, but this is important to me, so thanks for taking the time to read. Turning 30 isn't a bad thing at all. I'm happy, I'm always learning, and I still have things to work on. Overall its a good day, overall its a good life. Thanks for helping make it so everyone, peace out.


Anonymous said...

Yikes, you are old!

Chappy said...

Yup :)

Anonymous said...

Anyone who has Battle Beasts will never be old.

Mike T.